#i genuinely want this to happen but theres a hurdle i want to clear that im also excited abt in a challenging way. yknow

[yuuminni]

well on the bright side i think its nice to have a thing i want sooo bad and its within my power to get it, even if im shaking like a chihuahua over the possibility of not succeeding rn.

[cryptvokeeper]

What's your full opinion on midnight gospel?

man thats just asking for a whole ass rant isnt it. Props to you though bea, you always know just what to ask that is literally the most validating.

The animation is gorgeous, of course. The style is so so beautiful and I really cannot think of anything to compare it to. Sorta vaporware, early internet blog type style. but even that is relative because each world is so unique in its visual design, it's amazing. You get a really clear idea of these worlds in the twenty minutes you spend in each, almost entirely through the visuals. It all feels very thought genuine.

anyway when I first started it I thought it was pretentious as shit. the topics Clancy and his guests discuss are all really heavy topics on meditation, philosophy, life-death-and-the-universe type stuff. It gives a very stoner white guy talking about buddhism vibe. At the same time though these people he talks to aren't idiots. All the guests he interviews aren't just written characters, theyre actual interviews with people that have been set to animation. He very clearly speaks to experts on the things he talks about, as much was anyone can be an expert on things like magic and meditation and life and death. But then thats a whole new hurdle because its not just pretentious bullshit, its smart pretentious bullshit and you listen to it and you feel like an idiot! they were referencing books and thinkers I had no clue who they were. its all just very dense.

My friend called it a stream of consciousness show, and im inclined to agree. I dont like that style of storytelling though, so I was really just holding out for the bits of actual connective story tissue at the start and end of each episode, because there are some good story threads there! you want to know whats going on that got Clancy here in the first place, you want to know why so many worlds are dying out, theres sort of a feeling it'll build to something greater.

spoiler; it doesnt. and thats okay

The first time I really connected with the show wasn't until episode six but when I did it was really good. in every way, this is the episode that pulls back the curtain. Like, all media is preachy, ok? Thats the unspoken agreement you make with a creator of a show or book or whatever when you sit down to consume it; you open yourself up to being talked at, and the story’s job is to be entertaining enough that you dont notice youre being talked at. mileage may vary depending on the audience or. the media on how preached to you feel and how much you can tolerate. my point is though, that for me, episode six is the first time during the series I felt like the people preaching at me hopped off the stage and met me on my level. It was like they sat in the audience with me and went ‘hey bud, how do you think the shows going so far?’

This is also the point where all that connective tissue I was talking about comes together. And, it turns out, its not all that big a payoff, but you dont even mind that because A) it gives these characters a goddamn break which is what Clancy deserves and B) you dont need a big plot payoff because you get a big emotional payoff. Stream of consciousness payoff, as much as a stream of consciousness can have a payoff. catharsis.

And then those last three eps, god. It was the perfect combo of coming off the high horse and finally talking about topics I understood. Things that applied to me, not that the rest of the show couldn't apply to me, the whole show is pretty universally applicable stuff. but this kept up the trend of things being talked about on my level. and the last episode? I won't spoil it here but that last episode was everything. it made me cry, but like the good kind of cry that lets everything out and leaves you feeling relieved. For me it was because I could relate to what happened to Clancy (not directly, thank god, but I had a fresh hurt that that conversation really helped with) but I think that even if you cant relate. at all, just being someone who watched the show and got invested in the characters, that episode will pull at the heartstrings. And really this is the big strength of the stream of conciseness format, and of the ‘live’ guests is that you get such genuine conversations and emotions. As I writer this is the sort of thing I dream of being able to convert through planned written works.

tldr I liked it and will very likely be watching it again to actually try and untangle everything the characters are saying, and also whenever I need to get outside my own head for a bit. its a very cathartic show once you get past the pure density of it. I really do recommend it